Thursday, September 4, 2014

On Uncertainty

Since last winter I had been planning on moving to South Korea in August to teach English. I even got my TEFL certificate and had all my paperwork together. I'd even been offered the job.

Then everything fell apart.
I didn't get to go to Korea in August. I am still stuck in my hometown in the US of A.
I work two sporadic jobs and I live at home.
Hope got to go, which I think sometimes makes it worse for me.

So I decided to write a post on how I'm dealing with having my plans for an entire year crumble around me, and the huge uncertainty that followed.

Cute pic with the bf that wouldn't have happened if I'd gone to Korea.

My main way of dealing with disappointment and having no idea what to do with my life is to set little goals and plans.

I knew for about a week or so that Korea probably wasn't going to happen. I had two weeks before I was supposed to start teaching, and my contract still had not arrived. (I'll write a post specifically on why I didn't get to go to Korea at a later date)
About a week and a half out I gave up. I cried a bit, then accepted that I wasn't going to get to go. Instead of dwelling on the trip I wasn't going to be taking, I focused on one I could take. My gram had told me that YC and I were invited to Rehoboth if Korea fell through. So I focused on that instead of moping about Korea. Not that I didn't mope. I moped a lot. I'm actually more mopey now that Hope is there. Sigh.

Focusing on Rehoboth helped me cope with the loss of my plans for Korea. I focused all of my attention on going to the beach with my family and boyfriend instead. It helped a lot. Even though I couldn't go to Korea, I COULD go to the beach.
Guess what? I had a blast. Just because I'd missed out on a trip I really wanted to take didn't mean Rehoboth wouldn't be awesome.

I didn't let the Korea nonsense ruin my trip.

It's been a bit harder to stay positive since then. So to cope with the sad I'm making more plans.
I'm reapplying to Korea, and I have applied to Japan as well. In a couple month I'll apply to JET and BEDA as well.
Even though I'm not doing the job I wanted to be doing right now, I still have two part time jobs. It didn't ruin me financially.

I didn't get to go on the fantastic trip I wanted though. So now I am planning other trips. Focusing on potential trips in the coming months keeps me from devolving into a ball of sad.

So here are my two plans that are keeping me going:
1. The Virgin Islands- My cousin is moving there in October with one of his friends. I think they're going to work at resorts. So I informed him I would be visiting him. The flights from here aren't too expensive, and free housing once I get there! I'll probably go in October or November. Hopefully. I need to plan a bit.
2. Singapore or Seattle- YC is from Singapore and he and his parents have been debating whether they're going to come visit him or if he is going to go home over winter break. If they do come, we are all going out to Seattle. If he decides to go home, I get to go to Singapore! So either way, I get to go on a fun trip! This is the main thing I've been fixating on to cheer myself up.

Dorky faces at the dam near my town that Also wouldn't have happened.

So the moral of this post is: just because something bad happened doesn't mean other good things won't. Focus on the cool stuff you can do instead. I personally like to believe everything happens for a reason. So perhaps Korea wasn't meant to be, at least not right now, but Rehoboth, the Virgin Islands, and Singapore/Seattle wouldn't be possible if I'd gone to Korea.
The lovely time I already had in Rehoboth and the awesome trips to come this year will make  up for the sadness I felt about missing out on Korea.

So if you miss out on some grand plan, make new plans! Even if they aren't as big and exciting. Who knows? Maybe they'll be better anyway.

Here's to looking on the bright side.

Oh look. MORE awesomeness in Rehoboth that wouldn't have happened. (Also, I get more time with the bf. Which is nice.)

Have any big plans you've been looking forward to fallen through? How did you cope? Any suggestions on other fun things I should do to distract myself?
Also now I get to play Dragon Age 3 when that comes out, so there's that. haha

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